What if parents can’t agree contact arrangements after a separation?

The end of a relationship is the start of a new way of living. A new home, different financial circumstances, reshaped independence.

These things take time to establish and, in most cases, some cooperation between the two people that have separated. Working together is ideal, because it allows a former couple to determine the outcomes that work for them and their family. However, the process is not without its difficulties. Dividing assets can be challenging, particularly when relations have soured and where communication has faltered.  

Difficulties can be heightened where separated parents are looking to agree where their children will live and how contact with each parent should be maintained from month to month. While some families are able to find the balance that works, it is common for there to be disagreements over what is ‘fair’. In these discussions, the focus is sometimes on parents’ perceived rights rather than on their children’s best interests – something that can escalate tensions and make an agreement even less likely.

Involving an independent third party can be the ideal solution. As a last resort, this might be a family court judge but there are alternatives to court that we recommend clients try when post-separation arrangements are proving tricky to agree.

One alternative is mediation, allowing the couple to benefit from the guidance of a trained mediator who helps narrow the issues and facilitates discussions that, in many cases, lead to an agreement for the family’s future.

Alternative resolution options are beneficial alternatives to the court process. Not only do they keep decisions private and in the hands of the people at the centre of the issues, but they can be quicker, less expensive, less formal processes that can aid collaboration. In some situations, people find they leave on better terms with their ex – an often unexpected and hugely positive building block for the years to come.  

For advice about agreeing child arrangements, or any other issue to do with separation, divorce or dissolution, contact our family law team on family@bsandi.co.uk or call 01264 353411.